j2_crack | Kettle of Trouble – Take II j2_crack Halloween Comment-Meme

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Kettle of Trouble – Take II j2_crack Halloween Comment-Meme

It's coming up on Halloween again and time to dust off the old caldron and open the Kettle of Trouble Halloween Meme — Take II here at

j2_crack! We had some amazing fills last year, so, time to take up the torch, give us a prompt, or create something in fic, art, or vid, to celebrate Jared and Jensen and the trouble they can get up this Halloween.

And help spread the word – pimping banners below. We need to get the word out so folks will get their Boo On!
Use of J2 art donated by Demachi

The Rules:

1) Comment to this post with any and all prompts for Kettle of Trouble. You want spells, witches, invisibility, tattoos from dusty books, herbal drinks with weird kickback, disastrous results from reading your lines aloud backwards, ancient objects you should never have touched, (and definitely never inserted) all with a Halloween twist? This is your meme! Channel all your ghoulish feels and crack on! Prompts can be kinky, porny, or gen, and other characters are welcome as long as the prompt includes at least Jared or Jensen.

2) Fill those prompts with fic or art or vid! Writers and artists, you don't have to follow the prompt to the letter, but try to help the prompter go home happy. More than one fill to a prompt is welcome.

3) For PROMPTS: Please list your pairing and any kinks when prompting, prompt as many times as you want, one prompt per comment.

WHEN FILLING IN: Please put "Filled" in the subject line along with a title for your fill. Linking to your own journal for fills is fine, but it would be preferred if you post both HERE and on your own journal. If it is a long fic. Do a

j2_crack posting and link to it.
It just makes the meme page more exciting. But crack anywhere, anytime is fine.

4) And have fun doing it! It is

j2_crack after all

5) Tell all your friends! ~~And family~~ or not

6) And spread the love. If needed we can provide a spell.

Anonymous commenting is on, but will go through moderation, IP logging is off. And PM me if I've messed anything up!
A list of fills will be assembled as they happen.

Pimping Banners.
Code courtesty of

digitic who came to our rescue. Thanks so much!

350 pixel J2
Kettle-of-Trouble-v2-350

500 pixel Jensen
Kettle-of-Trouble-500

500 Pixel jared
Kettle-of-Trouble--Jared-500

500 pixel J2
Kettel-of-Trouble-v2-500

[ Free pimping Icon for the taking ]
Kettle-of-Trouble-jensen-icon

Now Get cracking!

Our fic fills
When The Cat's Away, Jared/Jensen by

ilikecrystals
Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King Jared/Jensen by

meus_venator
Garden Gnome, Jared/Jensen by

walking_tornado
The house at the end of the street, Jared/Jensen by

reggie11
No place like home, Jared/Jensen/Chad! by

ilikecrystals

Our art fill!
NSFW doodle 'On Halloween all of Jensen's sex toys get cursed' by

siennavie

Thanks to everyone who participated this year. We may have only had a few fills, but they were all awesome quality!!!! GO READ/LOOK AT THEM if you haven't yet.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

J1 has always been teased as being a bit of a scaredy-cat so, to prove he's not, he accepts his friends' dare and reads from an old book in a cemetery on halloween night, nothing happens (so he thinks) and his friends jump out and scare him. But, later on that night, there's a knock on the door and it's J2 - the spell actually did work.

Edited 2014-10-01 02:00 (UTC)

J1's grandmother was a known witch in her village in the old country. After she dies she bequeaths all of her belongings to her grandson. J2 helps J1 sort through bits and pieces and stumbles across an entry in her grimoire about her and her coven using flying potion and how it's only to be used during an All Hallows ceremony. J1 finds the labelled potion bottle in among the boxes. It has to be rubbed all over the skin just before midnight. J1 convinces J2 that they should try it because his grandmother was pretty legendary with her skills.

They perform the little ceremony at the appointed time and help rub each other down with the potion. It turns out that the the potion does make you fly, but not how they thought. The potion is a powerful hallucinogen and now they're both high as kites. Cue antics.

Edited 2014-10-01 02:58 (UTC)

Do you know those Harry Potter Woke Up Gay fics? This prompt combines the tropes with your choice of wanky goodness (meant here in a lighthearted way):

After a controversial incident at a convention, J1 is cursed by a fan witch, and wakes up a feminist (or other social activist of your choice). J2 only has till the end of the convention to figure out what's going on, how to save his beloved J1, and what the fuck intersectionality means.

Edited 2014-10-01 08:33 (UTC)

There's a creepy old house at the end of a dead end street in Jared's town. He's heard tales about it his whole life. Sometimes it was said that it was haunted, others that a witch lived there. The house had such a reputation not even as high school students would he and his friends approach. it. But he gets a little drunk with friends while home from college on Halloween, and this time when his friends dare him to go up and knock on the door, he does ...

Jared is not your typical garden gnome, for one he's the tallest gnome in the entire history of his people, plus there's the whole lack of stealth thing as it's entirely impossible for him to hide his massive body under a toadstool - good thing he's invisible most of the time. Unfortunately, Jensen, whose garden he's living in, thinks his garden is probably haunted, judging by the seances and strange people who Jared has seen wandering the yard, but this Halloween Jared's got a plan on how he's finally going to meet him...

Edited 2014-10-01 22:25 (UTC)

J1 is a traditional monster-under-the-bed and he's been doing nicely thank you, until he gets assigned to single dad, J2's kid. J2 doesn't believe in monsters but he teaches his child to use a BB gun to scare off any monsters. J1 sticks around intending to show him just how scary he can be. It's hard to be noticed when nobody really believes in you and the longer he stays the more he wants to be the monster IN J2's bed.

Jared's body hair is sentient - and it's jealous of Jensen's freckles. Things come to a head on Halloween when Jared covers up in his costume - but Jensen is practically naked proudly showing off acres of skin and of course freckles.

Edited 2014-10-02 00:32 (UTC)

It must be late ... or early!

Mooseen!!

"Clap your hands if you believe" might have been a story, just made for TV, but when Jensen as Dean yelled out his famous line, "Fight the fairies!" it just so happened that Puck was passing by. The line horrified him, so he went to the Seelie court to tell the queen. Now, the fairies have decided that they're going to fight back, and the J's are going to have to defend themselves or...

To finally get the hot older guy down the street to notice him, Jared gets himself a love potion from his witch friend. Unfortunately she is new to the business and things go spectacularly wrong.

J1 shows up at his friend's costume party dressed as Rocky Horror, wearing tiny gold shorts and not much else. He spies his corseted Dr. Frank N Furter across the crowded room and sexytimes ensue.

On Halloween Jensen dares Jared to read something from an old book they find in the prop department on set. The next day they both wake up as cute, little fairies. Jensen is turning around again and again, trying to get a proper view of his ridiculous green wings. Meanwhile Jared secretly tries to check out, that yes, even as a fairy, he's still bigger then Jensen.

After the shock wears off, they try to find a way to turn back human again.

Edited 2014-10-07 20:40 (UTC)

Chad can't believe his freaking luck. On his way home from some lame Halloween party, he finds free porn in the park. Just right there, the huge lion putting his big dick into that chick in the blue dress. Chad, still a little drunk, is sure they won't mind that the scarecrow is about to join them.

On Halloween all of Jensen's sex toys get cursed, and all of them want to be in Jensen's ass right now. Jared has to protect Jensen's ass with his cock.

Ooh, I love this! What about the reverse, though-- with Jared as the Pumpkin King? Jensen can be whoever/whatever you want (surprise me!), but I love love love the idea of Pumpkin King Jared.

So..I think I may combine this prompt with the one above it. Is that alright with you?

This contains NON-CON at first so be aware! Non-beta'd so probably filled with errors. Sorry.

**
“Just get your shit and get the hell out of here.” Jensen stalks out of the room, barely hearing the apologies in the pleading voice of his 'as of five fucking minutes ago' ex-girlfriend, and he’s pissed as hell because it happened again and you’d think he’d fucking learn.

Just another bitch wanting his money, wanting to be attached to his fame, his looks and his wealth and he’s so fucking sick of it!

“Jensen, please, baby, you know I love you, only you, and I just need a little cash, just to tide me over, get me through. You know how it is…“

Yeah, he knew.

Unfortunately, she didn’t know him very well and once she asked for money, the wall in his brain came crashing down, all bets were off and she was outta there-

So fucking fast, the door didn’t have a chance to hit her in the ass on her way through.

And he’d shut down, been barely aware of her leaving because he’d already moved on, his mind clicking with his newest experiment, heart thumping at his research and his freaking courage because he’s close, he knows he is, can feel it and holy shit, if this works, it’s gonna be fucking awesome!

Found the perfect specimen at his favorite coffee shop two days ago.

He’d almost swallowed his tongue when the six foot four gorgeous length of hotness passed by his table, latte in hand, to settle at his lone laptop in the corner, the sway of the man’s tight ass enough to make his dick swell, but it was the exotic eyes and deep dimples that had captured him.

Beautiful, just beautiful.

Perfect, really and he had to, he just couldn’t help himself.

Managed to swipe the dude’s coffee container from the trash and dash away, knew he could swab the spit from the rim and then recreate the DNA-

Of the single most perfect human being he’d ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on.

And now it would be all his.

Perfect, foolproof.

Ran the specimen through his recombinant DNA transcription replicator and now, twenty-four hours later, the proteins are ready, waiting to be compiled into the most incredible, exquisite, beautiful, handsome, flawless fucking boyfriend of all time.

And then Jensen won’t be alone anymore. Because his boyfriend will be absolutely perfect in every way.

He wants specifics, starts splicing genes, his brain systematically going through his internal list that Jensen’s had in his head since he was fifteen years old and realized he was gay and a geek.

*

He’d known then that he would never fit in, so far away from societal norms, it was scary. His intelligence, his absolute focus had enabled him to win grant after grant, prize after prize, turned him into a multi-billionaire, but it never gave him what he craved, deep in his gut, his heart.

Acceptance.

Wants to be loved, not for what he can buy someone but for who he is. Wants to be cared for because he’s a loving, kind man and not because he has a movie star face, has ‘let me suck your cock’ lips and dreamy jade-green eyes whose thick lashes curl sweet and natural, and seem to enthrall every single person he meets.

*

So, yeah, he’s splicing and recombining and he’s very methodical because he wants to be sure-

Sure that his dream lover’s cock is huge, long and thick so Jensen can ride on it for hours, wants his man to have incredible stamina, so that he can have multiple rounds without rest.

Sure that his creation is agoraphobic, not wanting to leave the house ever because if the clone should meet with the ‘real man’ he’d been modeled after, the consequences would be devastating.

Needs the man to be intelligent and a good conversationalist because Jensen is bored, lonely as all hell and dammit, he wants someone with a brain!

Doesn’t need it to be rocket science debating, just needs to be stimulated, challenged because after the lovemaking is over, needs his brain fed as well.

So he’s going to download data into the prototype’s mind: current events, scientific studies and research, as well as novels and textbooks, magazines and movies.

He smiles to himself as he peruses titles-may as well throw a little porn into the mix as well…

Edited 2014-10-26 18:53 (UTC)

*
He works late into the night and finally, all is ready. He has the humanoid mixture of cells and plasma floating in a pool of warm saline, electrodes hooked up to the gelatinous bulbs that protrude where limbs will appear and another on the enlarged nub where his lover’s handsome head will grow.

*

Jensen bites at his lip, uncertain suddenly because this is huge, never been done before-a human being created from spit on a Styrofoam cup but his research is sound and he knows it will work.

Sure he can do this. But should he? What if the clone is unhappy, aggressive, passive or psychotic? There’s a hundred thousand things that could go wrong here – especially since the donor’s psyche is unknown to him so yeah, this is probably a really damn bad fucking idea.

But fuck, he’s so goddamn lonely and he wants a companion, needs one to be whole, to be balanced, and yeah, this sure isn’t a healthy way to find a lover but he’s so goddamn done with ‘dating’ and ‘getting to know each other’ and ‘getting involved’.

Been trying that for freaking years and what’s it got him, huh? Jaded and depressed, with a hatred towards society that is cold and vicious-all the woman and men he’d been involved with, trying his best to find his soul mate and all they’d cared about, every single fucking one of them, was his money and his looks.

Didn’t care one whit about him, the real him, the hurting, scared, lonely him that has needs so deep, he’s frantic with them.

Nope, all they’d wanted, all of them, was to get as much as they could from him and then to ditch him as fast as possible.

So he’s done with that dating crap, he’s just done.

So fuck it if this is wrong, it shouldn’t be. He’s doing this and he’s gonna fucking enjoy the hell out of his new boyfriend so the world can just suck his dick and deal.

He sets his jaw and lunges forward, flicks the switch before he can talk himself out of it and the water in front of him comes alive, rolling and crawling, the mass inside twitching and writhing, bucking in the electrical current as the water starts to boil.

Ice water is shot in automatically to maintain correct body temp and he’s whispering, “Go, go, go…”

Because fuck he did this and now, no matter what, he’s gonna have a human tomorrow morning, that’s just for him, that’s gonna love him so good.

Please, God, let this clone love him so good.

Jensen turns away from the tears suddenly filling his eyes because crying is a useless emotion, no cause and effect of gain shown from that particular feeling and he shakes it off, it’s not scientifically sound to bawl like a baby so he’s just gotta suck it up.

And his eyes settle on the cage door in front of him, open and empty and what the fuck?

It’s his genetically altered Manx cat, Jared, the damn thing is a fucking genius and is always getting out of his crate, can work any lock open with its paws so easy and Jensen usually enjoys the game, Jared hides and he plays seek but he so does not need this shit now-

He’s wiped out, needs to sleep but he can’t until he finds the damn cat-

Purses his lips and gives a sharp whistle, it’s his call for the cat to come out and usually Jared will stroll in, looking very superior because he bested Jensen, hid so good his Master couldn’t find him and he gets a treat for it, because Jensen rewards intelligence and his cat is so freaking smart it’s scary.

But this time, Jared doesn’t come out.

There’s only silence and for some reason, Jensen’s heart catches and stills, waits with bated breath for something-

Where the fuck is the cat?

He hears the wail before he sees it, spins around and spies the furry body trying to get out of the tub, frantic and scrabbling but it’s too late, already electrified and sizzling, melting into the slick humanoid mass and No, Jesus Christ, NO!

He races forward to shut off the voltage but catches himself, stops because at this point, it’s no use, Jared is already dead, gone, body melded with the plasma, joining and mutating and there’s no stopping this now, just gotta wait and see what the hell kind of monstrosity surfaces from this-

Now what the hell is he gonna do?

*

Edited 2014-10-26 18:56 (UTC)

*
Jensen wakes with a jerk, a string of spit dragging from his mouth to his textbook and he groans, his back is fucking killing him and where the hell is he?

With aching clarity, the night before comes back.

He’d done it, broken the cloning laws and created the perfect man-

But then, the cage door, the cat and he’d spent the rest of the night researching the consequences of human/animal co-cloning, the side effects and adverse reactions but the scant experiments he’d been able to find had never dealt with this type of screw up and he’s terrified, truth be told, trying to look at the situation scientifically but Jesus, fuck, this is bad…doesn’t know what the hell he’s gonna be dealing with when he works up the courage to go back into the lab-

*

Jensen eases open the door, listens carefully but there’s no sound, no movement so he chances another step forward, holding his breath.

And he’s suddenly yanked forward by strong hands, his lab coat flying behind him and he sees a blur of pink skin, dark hair and wild eyes-

There’s a shrill growl filling his ears as he’s shoved to the floor, held down with a solid weight across his back.

Something scrabbles at him, at his ass, ripping at his pants and his skin is suddenly bared to the wind, deep scratches on his flesh from the claws that just ripped his clothes right off him-

“Wait-just-“ He’s stuttering, stumbling, doesn’t know what the hell is happening here but there’s a wild mewling behind him, a vicious snarl and he’s caught and held fast, Jesus, fucking teeth are on him-catching at the slope of his neck, holding him down and keeping him in right there, biting down, digging in until he can’t move.

And something is poking at him from behind; it’s hot and hard and wet-

Fuck, it’s a cock-

And Jensen screams when it juts in between his ass cheeks, searching and prodding, plunging in with wild thrusts to find his clenching hole and he’s struggling with all his strength, shouting to the rafters but there’s no help, no way out because the form above him is strong, fierce and clinging to him like a second skin and he can’t breathe, can’t focus-

Knows he’s about to get fucked, knows it’s gonna burn like hell because he’s freaking dry, not ready for this, no lube, no spit and he’s trying to curl into himself, to crawl away but he’s held in a vice-like grip, the teeth clenched hard in his neck, holding him by the scruff and oh, damn, oh shit, oh fuck!

The penetration rips through his stomach, it’s a fiery howl of agony and he shrieks as the hard length behind him shoves in, dives deep and bottoms out, fills him up in a fast spear of agony and Jesusshitfuck, that hurts!

The body behind him starts fucking hard and fast, thrusting in and yanking out, crowding in, bending his knees and spreading his thighs and he’s got no choice, no say in this, it’s brutal, savage and all he can do is take it.

He tries to buck the man off, twisting and rolling his body, desperate to get that merciless dick out of him but it’s burying deep with each thrust, ripping him wide open, wrenching apart a place that’s never been used, hell, never been touched and he’s crying, tears rolling down his face, can’t stop this, any of this.

His mind is shutting down with the driving force, the pull back and crash forward, his muscles fighting every push, every slam in-

Jensen screaming but it’s not his voice, it’s high-pitched, hysterical and crazed, breaking with the agony in his ass as he’s ripped apart-

Without consent, without permission, the cat-man thing on his back is panting harsh in his ear and Jensen’s keening, a high whine that he can’t stop ripping out of his throat and his asshole is being pounded open, wrecked with each vicious shove.

The next plunge in hits against his prostate and Jensen jerks with that, can’t even stop the babbling that comes out of his mouth because the jolt of pleasure after the pain shoots through his veins and down his legs, making him crazy, yelping with delight, and hungry for more-

And the damn cock inside him keeps hitting that spot-

Turning him stupid, compliant and it just feels so damn good!

*

The words behind him surprise him, can’t even believe that this thing can speak…coherently and distinctly and the words has his heart banging in his chest, “Found you, MrryMaster.”

The voice is guttural, old, and his head flies to images, of them playing hide and seek, Jared often besting him and the look of satisfaction on the cat’s face is now mirrored in the voice growling against his neck, teeth still buried deep in Jensen’s flesh. ”Trying to hide from me, pretending you don’t want this. Isn’t this why you made me? You couldn’t have this as I was so you made me into a man. Always loved our games, escaping, hiding from you, making you work to find me and now you’re the mouse, you’re the prize and this, this is the best prize of all.”

Another hard shove inside him and another, the rub inside a sweet spark and yes, this is what he wanted, just this-

Wishes his lover had made sure he was ready, so he could have enjoyed it from the start but it’s so good now, he can barely breathe with it.

Jensen settles in, hears himself whimpering and can’t help his hips as he thrusts back, wanting the man above him in deeper, harder.

The growlpurr above him has him closing his eyes, the harsh clench of teeth on his neck release and the soft licks up the side of his face soothe him, make him lean into the odd caress.

The gasp of words repeated with each slide of tongue, “MrryMaster, MrryMaster…” fill his ears as the hips above him stutter for a moment, stop and his legs are pulled together tight, the dick inside twitching, growing and what the hell is happening?

What the hell is that?

It’s something inside, suddenly painful, sharp and cutting and it progresses fast to pure agony, the bright pings of it making him scream, the hoarse cries ripping out of his throat, “Ahhhhhh! What-what-ohhhhhh, OWWWWAHHHHHH…”

“Shhhh, MrryMaster, it must be, have to finish-“

Through the haze of pain, he remembers…when cats mate, the male penis has barbs that imbed into the female, holding her to him so he can come, so she can’t get away while he isn’t holding her down with teeth, so they will procreate.

Jared waits another moment, until he’s fully engorged, fully attached inside of Jensen and then his hips start to move again, the needle point barbs holding him in place, allowing only small thrusts and the burn inside changes, becomes something new.

It’s titillating and exhilarating, the spikes digging into him almost sweet, it settles in his spine, in his gut as a warm shudder, a deliciously never ending thrill that sparks and ebbs, flares and shimmers-

He’s pulled back by his hips and then the curved paws on his shoulders jerk him up, rock him slightly and he’s gasping, sitting on hard thighs even as his legs spread and the soft claws reach around, curve along the length of his straining dick and he almost sobs at the sensation.

Because it’s a stinging caress, fur plush and talons biting at the same time-

Two pulls of his dick, a rough tongue licking and biting his ear and Jensen's crying out, coming so hard he’s shaking, weak and limp as the rushes spurt out of him, shooting his load straight up onto his belly. The thrusting behind him turns earnest, short, sharp plunges followed by an anguished yowl as a hot flood fills him, the throbbing yank of the barbs inside pulling another shiver of orgasm out of Jensen, leaving him gasping, exhausted.

The body behind him pulls him close, rolls them over until they’re on their sides and a nose is nudged into his cheek, trying to rouse him and he gives a half-hearted moan, can barely move here, feels fucked within an inch of his life and he just needs to sleep.

“Look at me, MrryMaster.” The low purring voice is inside his head, shivers through his nerves and his eyes pop open, can’t help but obey-

Turns his head and finally sees his mate, sucks in his breath in surprise-

Because he’s beautiful.

*

Edited 2014-10-26 19:06 (UTC)

His eyes are huge, upturned like a cat’s, but the pupils are human, the color a deep, warm green and his hair is long and flowing, the tips of his cat ears barely visible. The nose is small, upturned and adorable and his lips full and lush, with lifted corners like a constant smile.

His fingers are long, the claws retracted now and a light cover of fur coats his body, so blond, it’s almost invisible but he can feel it, soft and silken against his back. Jared’s muscles are sinew, long and lean from years of jumping and climbing and he’s quiet strength, a soft hum rolling out of his chest as he leans over, licks across Jensen’s mouth and fuck, he tastes sweet.

He can’t help it, has to whisper in awe, “My God, you’re incredible.”

The delicious lips curve into a smile as he licks again, tries to kiss the only way he knows and Jensen reaches up, catches at his face and holds him there, presses his mouth in and teaches him, shows him a proper kiss and Jared is a fast learner, his tongue rough like a cat’s and it’s tantalizing, plunging into Jensen’s mouth and curling around his, sizzling hot sparks up his spine with each swirl and when they break apart, Jensen’s dick is already stirred back up with interest.

“Can we-?” He blushes, moves back on the hard cock still buried inside him and knows Jared feels the same, the length pulsing through him and those freaking spines are still buried, each buck back he gives with his hips shivers honey up his spine, the painpleasure mix almost making him sob and he reaches back, catches Jared behind the head and whispers into the warm mouth, “Can’t you-your cock, it’s-too much, like that, can’t you-?”

His lover gives a regretful head shake, ”MrryMaster, the only way I can retract is by pulling out and I will hurt you. It is to give babies, make you ready inside for my seed and I don’t know how to stop it, I can-“ And he gives a sharp tug back but the pain is sharp, unbearable and makes them both yelp with it.

“Shit! What-what are we gonna-oh, Jesus!” Jensen sucks in a sharp breath as two fingers are shoved inside him, following the length of the still engorged dick and he can’t take it, it’s stretching him too much, feels like he’s ripping down there-

The fingers still at his hiss of pain then work more carefully in, pushing backward at the spines and it takes forever, to retract all of them but finally Jared is able to pull free without tearing Jensen’s insides to pieces.

They’re both exhausted at the end and Jensen’s ass is so sore, he can’t move, every twitch makes him moan and he doesn’t think he can walk.

Jared hushes him, rolls him over and slides down his back, opens his ass cheeks with gentle claws and bends his head, starts licking with his lucious tongue, cleaning and caressing at the same time and it melts Jensen, relaxes and arouses and by the time Jared’s worked his way deep inside, Jensen’s spread wide, tranquil and lazy, the pain gone.

“Is it better, MrryMaster?” The low drawling purr against his skin is pure delight and he sighs, nods, and tries to roll over, suddenly realizing that he’s still almost fully dressed, only his dick, ass and thighs exposed and he struggles up, starts pulling at his lab coat, his shirt, wants to feel that opulent fur all over his body-

Jared watches with curious eyes, mewling noises of encouragement and when Jensen’s finally naked, he gives another smile, bends in with his head and starts rubbing against him, scenting him, marking him and oh, fuck, Jensen loves this, every move, every caress.

Edited 2014-10-26 19:10 (UTC)

Could easily spend his life right here, with his sleek, sensual catman, their rough start completely forgotten because Jared hadn’t understood, hadn’t known how to show Jensen his love and now they can begin again.

Jensen reaches down, cups his hand around the enormous dick that’s stiff and ready, feels the spines just under the skin and laughs, finally free-

No more stupid people that want to use him, no more society that doesn’t understand him, nope.

This, this man, this space, is all he needs and they can stay here forever, until the end of their time, can easily live off his already made fortune, order food in, and never see another soul if they don’t want to.

Jared’s hand covers his, the barely retracted claws digging into his wrist in possession, “You like them?”

Jensen nods fast, drags his hand up and down along the fantastic length, “I love them. I love you. You’ve been my steady companion since I created you, the only other living thing I let close to me, and now, it’s perfect. You’re perfect. I’m so grateful that you got loose and got mixed in with the clone because now I have the best of every part of you and these?” He runs a fingernail over a relaxed barb, flexes the sharp tip, “These are incredible and feel so good inside me. “

He gives Jared a sweet kiss, “You feel so good inside me.”

And Jared catches his face, turns the kiss into a mind-blowing sizzle and Jensen doesn’t even know he’s moved, until his hand is pulled free just before the hard cock is pushing back into him, his slick hole opening up and the fit of them together is just perfect, so right he cries out with it.

And the words he hears fills his heart, makes him whole and he knows he’s finally home, for the first time in his life.

“Love you, too, MrryMaster. Love you, too.”

**

Ok, yeah, schmoopy and silly but I hope you liked.

Edited 2014-10-26 19:11 (UTC)

Jared had tried dating, seriously he had, but things had not gone well for him so far. For a guy that had handled the design, implementation, and rollout of Halloween for the last several hundred flawless years, it was amazing how awkward and bumbly he could be on a date. It’s not that he never had any sex, far from it, Jared was a red blooded Skeleton King from a long line of bone daddies. It was just that somehow things would always go sideways, and he was beginning to worry that he would never find that perfect someone to spend the rest of his Halloweens with.

Sure, if you didn’t count the singed wings and the chipped tooth he’d inflicted on Nicolas two months ago, it would have been kind of an okay date. How was Jared to know that when Nicolas said he wanted to see Jared’s eyes glow, he didn’t mean by sunrise? Jared had been so lost in the moment that when Nicolas started to squirm beneath him he thought he was simply doing a good job. When Nicolas literally burst into flames and sprang out of bed, chipping his tooth on the bedpost as he flew to the darkest corner of the room, Jared felt more than a bit foolish.

For some reason the cute vampire from the wrong side of town had never called him back for a second date.

And then there was the time he’d bowed to his mother’s repeated requests to hook him up with her second cousin’s son-in-law's nephew, the King of the Centaurs. That hadn’t gone so well either.

Jared might be bone thin but he was still a big boy, and Sthenios hadn’t appreciated having to look up at his date. Then there was the small matter that Sthenios wanted to top, and how did that even work when the centaur weighed a couple of tons and was hung like a horse?

Not wanting to cause some kind of inter-dimensional scene, Jared had tried to appease the man with a hand job because, nuh-uh, that thing wasn’t going anywhere near his ass or his mouth. But apparently, Jared had brushed against some poison sumac somewhere along their walk through the forest and, while Jared's skin didn't react, well.... Jared had had to send several fruit baskets to the hospital during Sthenios' recovery. Jared's mother still hadn’t let him forget that one.

It was probably his date with Gil, the second son of the King of the merpeople that really convinced him dating other eternals was not for him. Again, the date started out fine. In deference to Gil’s, um, gills, they had decided to meet in Atlantis. Gil had been the best kisser; maybe on account of the fact that he didn’t need to breathe, but then neither did Jared; whatever it was the man had the softest lips Jared had had the opportunity to kiss in a long time. The merman was also gifted with the sweetest voice Jared had heard in a millennium and Gil had generously serenaded Jared as they strolled through the King's underwater garden.

It was once they got down to business and Gil’s tail fin started to flap as he grew steadily more aroused that the trouble started. The small weights that Jared had attached to his limbs to keep him submerged for their date had gradually gotten knocked off as Gil was caught in the throes of passion. Just as Gil was ready to come, he gave a powerful surge of his tail, churning the waters, and Jared literally floated off the merman’s dick and up, up and away. Even from a distance through the dappled water Jared could see he was leaving the merman with the biggest case of blue balls Jared ever seen.

Jared had been so embarrassed he’d had to take fish off the menu for the next six months to avoid any flashbacks. When his mom phoned to try and hook him up with the Thanksgiving turkey guy Jared politely refused. When she called again to try and introduce him to Santa Claus’ nephew, who was taking over this year after Chris Claus retired, Jared had hung up on her. He was done with blind dates.

Part 4 is the same as part 3 and I think part 4 is missing? Otherwise - awesome fic! :)

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Kettle of Trouble – Take II j2_crack Halloween Comment-Meme

Jared/Jensen

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Jared/Jensen or Jared/Jeff

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Jared/Jensen, fairies, cursed!boys

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Re: Jared/Jensen FILLED When The Cat's Away 1

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Re: Pumpkin king!Jensen/Jared FILLED: Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King - 1

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