Fic - The Best Fucking Day! (NC-17, Queer/Slash: Jared/Jensen)

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Title: The Best Fucking Day!
Author: eboniorchid
Fandom: The CW/WB
Characters: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Prompt: Written for BadFic Idol at Wincon 2013: Las Vegas. VOTED #1 BADFIC!
Word Count: ~1,000 words.
Rating: NC-17 for sexuality and language.
Warnings/Spoilers: BADFIC! (WARNING FOR AWFUL ADJECTIVES, ADVERBS, & EVERYTHING ELSE!) Crack! Humor! Genderbending/genderfuckery. Crossdressing/drag. Trans* and genderqueer themes. Hustler!kink. Kink/BDSM. Bondage. Gonzo. Clichés. Established relationship. Graphic m/drag queen sex. Smut. Minor bodily injury (accidental). PWP. Slash? (I'm inventing a "Queer" category.)
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Really. Nothing. Also? Please do not use this as a kink or drag instruction manual!
Summary: Jared and Jensenia make a hot mess together with their swampy and meaty bits.

"Yeah! Fuck me like the price tags at Nieman Marcus!"